Tuesday, April 3, 2012

on facing unknowns

it's been a while huh? i write formal letters these days.. gone are the raging hormones of wishing endless nightmares for certain people. but I've noticed how i fueled my words with pain and hate in the past. writing to forget really. but for this entry, i write because i want to remember.

i want to remember how excited i got what he told me he was ready to ask permission from my parents! i remember taylor swift's love story's bridge playing over and over in my insane membrane! here, let me cut and paste so you don't have to google it:

"And said, marry me Juliet You'll never have to be alone I love you and that's all I really know I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress It's a love story baby just say yes"

i am rakenroll like that minus the white dress! haha but i was scared!.. of the thought of the both of them talking. but THEY DID and that was the good part.. almost as good as the ring below shining, shimmering, splendid;)


anyway.. i was talking about the stuff i want to remember.

i want to remember him pretending to not going to hongkong with me because he had other plans and that tickets were too expensive already.
i want to remember him pretending to be the macho-est guy when he was stressed to his stomach when he was in cebu.
i want to remember him talking to God before he met my parents.
i want to remember him making me feel like inviting all my friends was my idea!
i want to remember his hands shaking and his heart beating insanely fast.
i want to remember how red i got and how he is all i ever wanted.
i want to remember his family and how warm they always are to me.
i want to remember my friends and how i'm the luckiest bastard in the whole fucking universe!
i'm glad that i now find it good to remember:)

and now i have a gooorjus ring. and whenever i look at it... for a second, i think of he that loves me and i that love him... and then my mind starts to think of dieting and exercise and how i will ever fit into my mom's dress.

oh and here's mark and the promise of us not being in a long distance relationship any more (THANK GOD RIGHT?!) (photo by Ria Redulla)
i don't know where life is going to take us but i'm excited as hell as long as you're right beside me:) i love you my darling.